Airplanes, Airports and Attitudes

The more you travel, the more you notice social norms and the violators of said norms.  Maybe it’s the holidays, maybe it’s the cities, maybe it’s a societal trend… whatever the cause, Mark and I have observed some amusing bad behaviors in the past two days.

First observation, Park Meadows Mall.  A woman’s purse brushes another woman’s shoulder in a crowded hallway.  The woman spins around with her arms exaggeratedly thrown up in the air and exclaims with immediate offense for all to hear, “Excuse me!”   Really, over an accidental purse brush?  Seems like a bit of an over-reaction, but maybe she’s had a bad day.

Second observation, Wal-mart.  In nearly every aisle, someone scowls and eyes us down.  Is it my attitude?  I try to smile.  A family intentionally blocks us in an aisle and slow-pokes along.  Hmm, not loving it, but next time I’ll GPS a Target store instead.

Third observation, DIA.  An old lady wheeling an oxygen tank sits down across from Mark and initiates heavy, belabored breathing while eyeing him down.  After 15 minutes of apparent hinting, she quits the heavy breathing routine and spells out her irritation, “I need your wall plug in!”  “Excuse me?”  “They said I could plug in my oxygen tank, and I need your wall outlet!”  Just an unstated observation, but there are outlets everywhere and Mark is writing a final on his laptop, so he is using this particular outlet.  To solve her problem, Mark asks the gentleman behind him if he is not using the outlet, if this lady could kindly trade seats with him so that she can plug in her oxygen machine and they can use the outlet together.  She breathes normally and plugs in then promptly freaks out again with the heavy breathing routine because her outlet isn’t working.  “I need YOUR outlet!”  Mark trades with her and apparently neither outlet is working.  She gives up and goes back to normal breathing.  When we entered the plane, she was positioned in the exit row seating near the door.  Call me crazy, but I’m pretty sure she’s not saving us all if the plane goes down.  Also in exit row seating, a 70+ year old woman in a neck brace who wheeled herself in with a walker… pretty sure she ain’t saving us either.

Fourth observation, Delta flight from Denver to Atlanta.  The German guy in the window seat in front of us pops up without warning, puts his foot up on the shared armrest, literally steps over two people, and runs to the bathroom.  Maybe he had explosive diarrhea, I don’t know, but he didn’t apologize when he came back, and he did the same thing, abruptly crawled over the two passengers seated next to him, not once, not twice, but THREE times during the two and a half hour flight.  Pretty sure the two sitting next to him hated his guts.

Fifth observation, Delta flight from Denver to Atlanta.  Before I sat down, the man in the window seat warned me, “Listen, I’m an old man, and I have to go a lot.”  I smile, “Okay, no problem, just let me know, and I’ll be happy to get up whenever you need to.”  I sit down and he proceeds to take over the arm rest and a quarter of my seat with his elbow.  Normally, I would say something, but I scrunched my arms in and calmly tried to read my book within the confines of the remaining inches I had to work with.  People, don’t be jerks.  You paid for your seat, not your seat plus a quarter of the one next to you.  It’s bad manners to elbow someone out of their seat.

Sixth observation, 14 hour flight from Atlanta to Jo-berg, South Africa.  Everyone else is doing it, so why we decided to join in, but hopefully with more tact.  Flying coach on international flights is uncomfortable, so when we noticed that the exit row seating wasn’t filling up, we asked the stewardess if it would be possible to enjoy the luxury leg room.  She said that with all of the snow-delayed flights, it was entirely possible that they were open and available.  Another guy overheard our plan and wanted it for himself, so Mark plopped his bag and his body down in the chair and waited to see if anyone came for the seats.  They didn’t.  We got three wonderful seats in the exit aisle.  Other guy wasn’t happy about it, but we were assertive first.  What can we say?  Taking is apparently part of our culture.